Iokwe from OK!: Sorrrrreee

Iokwe!

So, we found out that for Zone P-Day this coming Monday we are going to drive over to Stillwater and spend a couple of hours at an indoor climbing gym! My entire life was centered around rock climbing before I left on my mission, so I am super excited. I've been trying to train for our climbing day to use our time as best as I can, and I am so sore. I definitely pass out almost instantly every night. I should have some pictures next week and they should be good because Elder Rodier, our district leader, is also a climber and we are already planning to have our own climbing competition (you can start placing your bets now).

I don't have a whole lot to update everyone on this week, so I'm going to keep it short and mostly respond to personal emails. However, I do want to share with everyone my goal for the time being:

Currently I am working on being more sincere. I have noticed that I will often not really mean what I say or not say what I actually mean. I'm getting better at it, but there are times when I will just say something because it will please the other person, but I don't really actually feel what I am saying. For example, the whole "You're the best!" compliment that everyone knows is more empty than the calories found in a Hostess snack. 

My vision is to be someone that can look people in the eye and they will really feel that I mean what I am saying, that I am complimenting them because I think it's true, that I am saying what I am saying because I believe it, and that I am really genuinely interested in their well-being. I feel that if I can achieve that, I will be a better influence for good because of it. Especially because I believe that the Savior is that kind of person and when He talks with people, they can't help but feel His words are full of meaning. Maybe I can't be quite like that right now, but I want to help people feel of His love and I can't do that if I'm not sincere about it.

If you have any suggestions on how to accomplish that, or ideas on how to refine the vision I have, send them my way!

Love you all, have a great week!

Jeramman!

Elder Josh Kilmer

Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission

不動心 Fudoshin:  immovable mind

www.mormon.org

Iokwe from OK! Choices

Iokwe! 

As we talk with people here in Enid, it often comes up in conversation how they know God exists or why they believe in God. For some reason, a common response is "Of course He exists: I should be dead right now!" which is usually followed by a related near-death experience. This week we were supposed to be struck by a "powder keg of storms" that would include some number of tornadoes. It sounded like the world was supposed to end here in Oklahoma. When it hit, it rained really hard, lightninged a bunch..... and then mostly passed right around us after about an hour and a half. We pretty much just ate dinner and then walked right back outside. So much for the life-threatening storm. I'm wondering if this "near miss" allows me to join the "I should be dead right now!" club.

Other than that, not too much exciting to report for this week. To be honest, I don't really have many updates for our area. Things are really slow right now and, as we have discussed the reasons why, Elder Smith and I have felt that we need to focus more on helping the branch grow and become more unified. We just aren't getting any traction in our areas because we aren't in sync with the branch. We've had some really good ideas already and we are hoping to finalize those this week and set plans in motion. 

Something that I have been thinking about this week has been choices. Our decisions are so important. President Monson, our current prophet, often says "Decisions determine destiny". I have really been learning how true this is. 

If you imagine a large gate, when you open the gate the movement near the hinges is quite small. The gate is really only passing over a small patch of ground. However, farther down the gate, the metal has covered a substantial distance. The difference was only a few degrees at the hinges. The same with a ship: if the captain intends to reach his destination, he must be sure to not deviate from the correct course or a couple of degrees difference could lead to hundreds of miles distance from safe shore.

Our lives are the same. If we are looking forward into the future of our lives, as if our path were highlighted in front of us, if we choose to turn a couple of degrees from what is right, we may find ourselves very far from safe harbor and unsure of how we got there. The decisions we make now, even small ones, will determine where we are and who we are in the future.

Let us choose to make good decisions now. If we desire to reach our intended destination of being happy, good, righteous people in the future, let us choose to do happy, good, righteous things now. Let us choose to make a bright future by choosing brighter choices today. Now. Let's not deviate from course. Hold to those things that support us in our efforts to become better and to lift others as they strive to do the same. Let us choose to remember the Savior and follow His path. 

I know we'll inherit a better destiny as we determine to choose the right now. 

I look forward to making it there with you all. Have a great week!

Jerammaan!

Elder Josh Kilmer
Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission, Marshallese speaking
不動心
Fudoshin:  immovable spirit
www.mormon.org

Iokwe from OK! Laughs and Tears (and more antithetical titles)

Iokwe!

It's not as good as the jumping picture (somehow we managed to orient ourselves according to height and make equally enthusiastic faces as we were jumping through the air but utterly failed to do so as we were standing on our porch....) but here's the Marshallese group in Enid! 

​In the picture, from left to right: Elder Nicholas, Elder Oberender, Elder Lakatu (that means "hot guy" in Marshallese), Elder Smith, and Elder Menlove

The laughs are due to Elder Menlove, who has gained slightly more control over his crazy laugh, which means it's an even more enjoyable challenge to get him to guffaw loud enough for the other side of the city to perk up. Even our branch president has joined in on the game. We are having a lot of fun; it's going to be an awesome transfer.

On to the tears: this weekend we had a funeral. One of the elderly members of our branch passed away early this last week. She had been sick for a long, long time, so it was actually a blessing and relief to her and to her family for her to move on to a more peaceful rest. So that was actually not the sad part, especially since her husband seemed to be at peace.

The sad part was the actual funeral. It was run by a group of pastors from another church, and not only was it disappointing, but it was a disgrace. Not once did the pastors testify of the Savior, the resurrection, or anything of value or comfort to this family. Not only that, but the funeral ended with a praise song - not to God - to the pastors themselves. As people walked up, shook their hands, and dropped money in a tin. The money was counted in front of everyone before the funeral even ended. It was disgusting. It is not my intention to criticize other churches, nor do I want the focus of my emails to be centered on negativity, so I am going to cut off my description there.

The reason I bring this up, however, is because the reason that funeral was so atrocious is because there was no hope. No truth was taught. No reminder of the Savior's sacrifice for us was given. No uplifting doctrine shared. None of God's promises of blessings for us were restated. At several points during my stay there, one of the daughters who had been separated from her mother during the last few months of her life stood by the casket and just wailed despairingly. And it left me wondering, "who is failing to teach these people?" 

Death is a really sad separation. If we don't understand its purpose. We came to this earth for two reasons: to learn and grow and to gain our bodies. Those are two major blessings. God loves us enough to provide a path for us to progress. As we come to this earth, we gain our bodies, and as we travel through life we have opportunity to, spiritually speaking, learn to crawl, walk, and run. We learn what choices are good and what ones make us and others unhappy. We gain intelligence. We progress. 

God loves us enough to want us to progress beyond a mortal body and limited intelligence. If we were to stay in this life forever, we would never obtain the blessings He has in store for us and we would forever be separated from Him. It's hard to see from our perspective here, where death seems like an end and a separation from our loved ones and from life and enjoyment, but if we were to not move on from here, we would only be able to receive a smaller portion of God's blessings for us. 

The Savior's purpose was to provide a path to overcome death. He lived for us, died for us, and then lived again for us. If He said "Come follow me", then that means that we will do the same. We are to follow His example in being obedient, following God's will, and moving beyond this life to receive our full inheritance of all that God has for us. 

I know that because of Jesus Christ's resurrection, we will be resurrected to regain our bodies in a more perfect state. I also know that God loves us too much to allow us to make friends and relationships and then tear us away from those we love. We will be with our families and friends again. I know that a knowledge and belief of these things brings us peace in this life and hope for a better life to come. 

Love you all. I know your Heavenly Father loves you too. That's why He made this plan. Let's follow it.

Jerammaan!

Elder Josh Kilmer
Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission, Marshallese speaking
不動心
Fudoshin:  immovable spirit

Iokwe from OK: Don't Judge Yourself Too Harshly

Iokwe!

I'm staying! Surprise! It was a pretty easy prediction. Elder Smith and I get another six weeks to work together, which I am really grateful for. I'm excited to bring the fire for another transfer. 

I'm going to keep this email pretty short and sweet. Especially since we are out of time this week.

I have made a lot of changes in my life in the past year and some. It's lead me to do a lot of reflecting on the past, especially my past character and behaviors. It has been productive, for the most part, but also sometimes has lead me to wallow a little bit in self-loathing and self-pity. I often look down on my past self and resent some of the decisions that I have made.

What I have learned from this is that it can be good to look back, but we need to be wise. Recognizing differences, comparing and contrasting, and judging are positive when they produce feelings of gratitude, humility, determination to change, and other uplifting emotions. If we spend time feeling sorry for ourselves because of our past mistakes or hating ourselves, it's time to give ourselves a break. Turn to the Savior and let him bear that burden, and lets move on. 

Love you all. Have a great week!

Jeramman!

Elder Josh Kilmer

Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission

不動心 Fudoshin:  immovable mind

www.mormon.org

Iokwe from OK! Moving Round 2

Iokwe!

Finally moved!!! This morning we woke up at 6:30 and just started hauling stuff out of our house and into to van and the truck we have here. We just finished cramming everything into the new house and we are so relieved to finally be done. Granted, we still have to organize everything, but I have no problem with that. It's all downhill from here. So, my new address is at the bottom of the page.

As for the rest of the week: On Tuesday, Elder Smith got the same sickness I got on Sunday, but much worse. So we took it a little easy. Thursday we had interviews with President Mansell. Friday we spent cleaning our house in preparation for moving. So, it was a bit of a slower week. 

However, we did have a wonderful lesson with someone we teach, named Ertila. We were reexplaining God's Plan of Salvation to her, which in a past lesson was a little hard for her to understand due to screaming children. Their house is always kind of noisy. They have 2-3 babies over there all the time, so it's never really peaceful. Well, part way through the lesson, this peaceful feeling descended on the home. It was just so quiet; not just quiet because the kids were asleep, but quiet in our minds too. My mind was uncluttered and it just felt like absolute peace. I really feel like that feeling was something that they needed, a relief from their normal, chaotic lives. That Spirit also prepared the way for Elder Lazarus to share his own beautiful testimony of having studied with Elders before himself back in the islands and how we didn't want them to study with us so we could have numbers in our church, but so that they could learn of the truth for themselves and be blessed for it. The Spirit was very strong as he spoke and I could tell that it really touched Ertila and those listening. It was a wonderful experience.

The thought I want to share this week is brief and is based on the following quote: "What we become will be the cumulative sum of the consequences of the choices we make. We will get exactly what we choose." -Elder Pearson

I feel like making good decisions often just involves not choosing wrong things. I also feel like that is just kind of getting by in life on bare minimums. Sure, that would probably be sufficient, but what good does sufficient do for us, let alone those we care about? We can become a real force for good in the world, a light for those around us. 

Let us be something more than sufficient. Let's not be the sum of mediocre choices. Let us actively seek to rise above just not choosing wrong, and let us become people who make choices to be good, turn outward, lift others, overcome obstacles, choose to be happy, not complain, and be a source of light. 

Love you all. Let's be awesome.

Jerammaan!

Elder Josh Kilmer
Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission, Marshallese speaking
不動心
Fudoshin:  immovable spirit