Iokwe from OK! More Growing Pains

Iokwe!

It's funny how foreign that word is to me after only a couple months.

We had a great miracle this week: On Wednesday, we got a media referral for someone who wanted a Bible and was also interested in a Book of Mormon. We took one of our members to go visit her and she loved every minute of it. She was so excited to learn and seems to have so many questions we can help answer. She's been through some difficult marriage issues and it just so happens that the member we took is someone who wrote a couple books on marriage and is currently a lawyer who works in that area. Imagine that. Needless to say, Prisscilla was really comforted by it all and has been happily reading the Book of Mormon since and asking a lot of questions. She's out of town this week, but excited to come to church and meet with us again. 

This last week or so has been quite the struggle. I keep coming to junctures in my life when I end up thinking, "I know I'm supposed to be continuing to progress and grow, but I can't recognize a lot more to improve on..." I essentially reach the extent of my knowledge of what I need to change about myself, kind of like how an athlete without a trainer can plateau and not understand how to reach higher levels.

That's usually when Heavenly Father kindly points out to me a couple things. If I don't get it from there, it's usually illustrated very vividly through a few crash and burn cycles. Thankfully I haven't been following the crash and burn route recently, but I have had a couple things revealed to me that have been pretty tough. But, I have come to better understand the value of this scripture that I have heard so often: 

And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them. (Ether 12:27)

It's been a great reminder of where true strength comes from. We can't expect it to come from ourselves - we've only had so much time to learn, stretch, and grow - we need to rely on the Lord as He helps to build up our strength. I know He has our growth and happiness as His goal.

What a blessing it is to have a Heavenly Father who loves us enough to point out our weaknesses. What if I stayed stuck in the stage of not knowing where to go from here? It would be like a child who was never able to leave the stage of stumbling steps that could barely be called "walking". I am so grateful, despite how hard it is to see myself clearly in a mirror, to be shown my imperfections and faults. I would never grow to be anything great otherwise. It's definitely been hard - I've had the choice of letting it get me down or denying it - but I've tried to let it humble me and as I have done so, I have felt the promise that weak things will become strong come true for me. I'm happy to look forward to a future where someday all weak things will have become strong for me.

Love you all! Keep growing!

Jerammaan!

Elder Josh Kilmer
Oklahoma, Oklahoma City Mission, English-Marshallese speaking
不動心
Fudoshin:  immovable spirit
www.mormon.org